ONE-SIDED FRIENDSHIPS | THE SIGNS

"I decided to put as much effort into contacting you as you do with me – That’s why we don’t talk anymore”.

Woah, pretty deep right?!

In all honesty though, who needs that type of friendship in their life?

Not me for sure.

I am so fortunate to have an amazing group of friends – I appreciate and love you all!

Anyways, most of us will do anything for our friends. We are there for them in their time of need (even if it is mad hour o’clock). We look after them when they’ve had way too much to drink. We support their plans and celebrate their achievements. And some of us even stalk, I mean, do research on their latest crush. 

The list of things some of us do for our friends is endless and that’s why it burns so much when it isn’t reciprocated.

Friendship is such a wonderful thing when both parties are putting in effort. You check on them, they check on you. They call you for advice and you know it’s totally fine to call them for the same thing. However it’s clear as day that you’re in a one-sided friendship when that supposed friend never comes through for you.

Before I get on to discussing some of the signs of a one-sided friendship, I just want to thank Tanisha for inspiring me to write this post.

The favour friend.

Helping out a friend is totally fine. After all isn’t that what friendship is all about?

However, I’m talking about the friend that ONLY calls you when they need your help. That individual isn’t your friend and they definitely don’t see you as theirs.

You my love are a free therapist.

The control freak.

You may brush off a controlling friend because you’re used to them but if you actually think about their actions you’ll seriously question how genuine their friendship is. A friend shouldn’t be controlling at all. A controlling individual typically doesn’t care about what another person wants or needs.

Chuck them.

The flaky friend.

Friends should respect each others time.

Does your friend always cancel last minute?

Does your friend always show up hella late?

Do they find it hard to apologise?

If you answered yes to all the questions above, then throw that whole “friend” away. They don’t see you as a priority and certainly don’t value your time.

I said throw them.

The emotionally draining friend.

This type of friend makes everything about them. You may go to them with a problem and within seconds your problems trigger their problems and conversation ends up with you trying to make everything better. This is a constant thing which then becomes super exhausting.

Save yourself.

The backseat friend.

No, I don’t mean the friend that likes to sit in the backseat of your car (no one likes that). I’m talking about the so-called friend that sits back and lets you plan everything. You’re always the one to call, text or suggest chilling together. It’s good to have ideas but if you’re the only one expressing the desire to meet up - what is the point of the friendship?

It takes two to tango.

The taker.

Ew, takers are the worst!

It’s nice to have friends that you feel no way about asking them to borrow something. However, if your friend is forever borrowing your things and not returning them, you’re dealing with a thief.

Yes, they are a thief!

The friend that doesn’t listen.

I know that some friendships consist of one talkative friend and one great listener. But sometimes the great listener doesn’t exist. They’ll be sat there nodding along but couldn’t even repeat a word of what you said if asked.

Forget them.

The thankless friend.

It’s a great feeling being appreciated. It’s nice to know that your friends appreciate you and value everything that you do. Saying thank you or showing someone that your thankful really isn’t difficult. If your friend doesn’t say thank you, then that friend doesn’t respect you.

What’s friendship without mutual respect?

I could go on and on about the signs of a one-sided friendship until the cows come home but really and truly they all overlap each other. Please keep in mind that these are just my views so don’t start overthinking your friendships.

Are you guilty of any of the above?

Lots of love,

Joy x