25TH BIRTHDAY CELEBRATIONS AND MORE!

Pre-warning; VERY picture & text heavy post!

Hey Friends… I can still call you that right? *bows head in shame*

See me as that friend, that you don’t speak to for a long time but when we do speak it’s as if no time has passed.

I can only apologise for my absence but this really isn’t the post to get into why. I just want to say welcome back to ‘The life of Joy’ and that I’ve really missed you all.

So, I turned quarter of a century on the 15th and got up to a few different things. Some planned and some not so planned.

13th October!

My beautiful friend treated me to a meal and a little pamper sesh. I had my nails and feet done and ended the day stuffing my face with chicken and waffles with access to unlimited prosecco. It was such a lovely day and I honestly can’t thank her enough.

14th October!

I planned to attend a day party with a few close friends. We were meant to meet up early for pre-drinks but I went into a “nothing looks nice” mood and more than half of my friends said they were running late.

Although I was having a complete wardrobe meltdown, I couldn’t help but feel bad for my friends that were actually ready. They kept telling me that it was fine but I honestly felt like a complete and utter monster. When I finally got to my friend’s house for pre-drinks, I almost cried. She had decorated her flat with so much love. There was a mini bar, gold and white balloons, sweets, chocolate fountain, cocktails and more. I just couldn’t believe it, everything looked super cuteeee and I can’t even show you guys because I only have video footage (as per). And it doesn’t even end there.

After the day party (which my girls made fun) I was surprised with a stripper. I just can’t deal with my friend Lu. She never fails to surprise and amaze me haha.

When midnight struck all my friends sang happy birthday to me and then I was out COLD.

My actual birthday!

I woke up feeling bleurgh. I had no plans and it really dawned on me that I was actually 25 years of age. I always believed that twenty-five was the age that you would need to have your sh*t together.

But what is actually having your sh*t together?

This may sound silly to some and others may possibly relate but this was the first birthday that I felt extremely down. The calls and texts made me smile but I just couldn’t get the stigma of having everything sorted at 25 out of my head.

I had my mum and a few friends ask to take me out and It’s not that I couldn’t be bothered, I just really wanted to be alone. A few hours passed and another friend really didn’t like the way I was sounding on my birthday. He suggested that we did something to get me in good spirits. I’ll never forget this day because I was a complete pain and yet he remained calm. After making multiple suggestions, we ended up going out to eat and drink. We spoke about how I was feeling and I honestly felt so much better. Having someone listen and pass on their words of wisdom is just what I needed. We ate, drank, laughed and had such a meaningful conversation. Thanks again Ola for turning my frown upside down.

Oh Boy.

I’ve had birthday parties before and I can put my hands on my heart and say this was the most stressful one to date. Things weren’t going as smoothly as planned but let me tell you about the one thing that irked me the most. Some of these tailors are actually complete and utter jokes. I went out and purchased some quality lace material because I wanted to look absolutely stunning. All I then needed was a tailor to bring my dream birthday dress to life. I messaged a few via Instagram/email as I always see their work and think ‘WOW’. Guys, I kid you not when I say half ignored me completely and the rest apparently didn’t make clothes for ‘my size’. I wish I was the type of person to really put people on blast because I was extremely hurt. I mean, I’m big but I don’t think I’m big big. I wear a size 16 and sometimes go up a size depending on the retailer. I’m constantly battling with my weight and really didn’t need such responses. I would’ve preferred if they lied and said that they were extremely busy.

I then decided to go to an African tailor. She took my measurements and took my material on the 5th October. I even gave her a deposit because I wanted two dresses made in ample time. She said my dresses would be made a few days before the 20th, in case adjustments were needed. I didn’t hear from her at all, so I decided to message her on the 16th for an update. Her reply was very brief but she said that I should collect the dresses on the 19th. This lady who lives an hour away wanted me to now collect my birthday dresses the day before my party LOL. My anxiety levels went through the roof, so I hopped online to find a backup dress.

Anyways, I ended up messaging the tailor the very next day about how uneasy I felt about collecting my dresses the day before. I suggested Thursday instead and that’s when her reply went from being brief to lengthy and RUDE. I didn’t dream of being rude back, so I told my auntie and she decided to call her. Let’s just say that the conversation didn’t go well and for the sake of my dresses my auntie remained calm.

Fast forward to Friday 19th, I went to collect my DRESSES with my mum and Lulu. When we arrived, it was clear to see that she started my dresses that very morning. Material from my dresses were all over the floor and she seemed rushed off her feet. She gave me my first dress to try on and it was hideous. She had put lining throughout, I had no cleavage, the dress was extremely tight and the train was short. I definitely didn’t look like someone who had just turned 25.

My friend told her to make changes and even with those changes the dress was still not what I wanted. I asked to try on the other dress and she kept telling me “one moment”.

Huns, Huns, oh Huns. My second dress wasn’t ready. She had only cut the material. Silly me still paid her the remainder and left with my dress and the material of the other one that she hadn’t started.

It’s a good thing I ended up ordering a back up dress from pretty little thing because THEY REALLY SAVED YOUR GIRL!

Day of my party!

I was feeling way more relaxed than I was during the week but I still had a few bits to sort out. I had to look for new heels, purchase some accessories and then collect my party decorations alongside my cake and cupcakes.

My cake and cupcakes were made by two different bakers. The cake baker came highly recommend from people online and the other was an old school friend. When I saw my cake on the bakers Instagram I was super excited – it looked soooo good.

However, upon collection of the cake I was told to drive with my windows open, with the air con on and to pop it straight into the fridge as soon as I got in. I didn’t even bother to ask why, I was just so excited to get home and see it. The collection point was only a 15 min drive from my house but it felt longer because I drove so slowly. As soon as I got home, I removed the Sellotape from the box and lifted the cover. I literally screamed.

Why had my cake gone skiing?

This is the cake after it was slid back into place : (

The buttercream was far from dry, in fact it was extremely wet. I sent a video and messaged the baker straight away. She apologised and asked about my driving lol. Trying to remain polite, I asked her how it was going to be sorted. She apologised again and said if she lived nearer she would’ve tried to fix it. I really didn’t understand how that helped me in anyway. I messaged her again to ask her how she would’ve fixed it and she said by putting chocolates at the bottom. You guys are probably thinking that she offered me a refund or compensation…

She didn’t.

I had to call my friend that made my cupcakes to come and save the day (@kakesbykeeks). Shout out to you baby girl because you really worked your magic!

Fast forward...

I’m getting my make-up done by the talented @dani_a.makeup and receiving the typical “I’m sorry” messages. I chose to ignore most of them because I really wasn’t trying to allow anyone or anything to upset me.

When I say she beat my face, the girl beat my face and more.

How is that even me?

Arrival!

When I finally arrived at my party I was a little tipsy but very excited to see all those that came out to make my night special. The DJ played ‘girl It’s your birthday’ as I walked down the stairs, telling myself repeatedly not to fall. I saw all my friends, family and phone camera lights and really didn’t know how to act. I wonder If that’s how celebs feel when cameras are constantly been flashed at them haha.

I just remember receiving sooo many compliments as I sparkled all the way to my treats table.

I accidently made everyone sing happy birthday twice because the cake wasn’t lit the first time – oops. And then a third time because it was actually my Mum’s birthday - Love you Mama x

(This picture is from her birthday dinner in the evening, as we didn't get any pictures together on the night)

But I honestly had a blast and can’t thank those that came out to celebrate with me enough!

THANK YOU...

Just look at my treats table and decorations.

Thank you to my Mum, Shuki, Tan and Wendy for doing such an amazing and professional job. If you want to book them for your events email me on: Imjustkidding@youcantaffordthem.com

Thank you to Shay, Talietha and Vicky for being patient with me on the day and keeping me in high spirits.

Thanks again to Talietha (both weekends) and Vicky for coming from outside of London to celebrate with me.

Thank you to Kiana for saving my cake and making some yummy cupcakes.

Thank you to Dani for making me feel ever so beautiful.

Thank you to Collins for slaying my hair.

Thank you to the photographer for helping me out at such short notice (@chantelle_simpson).

Thank you for the birthday wishes, gifts and those that treated me to days/evenings out.

Thanks Lulu, Nurat and Tan for doing speeches.

And thanks again to all my friends and family that attended.

I really hope I haven’t forgotten anyone!